Just try to resist the tats and dreads of Bob Sanders. Just try it.
Team: Indianapolis Colts
Division: AFC South
Notoriety: The original Colts franchise based in Baltimore packed up and left for Indianapolis in the middle of the night like a bunch of shady shadesters. Top receiver Marvin Harrison ran into legal trouble when a gun he owns was used in a recent shooting.
Quarterback(s): Peyton Manning, Jim "Maytag Repairman" Sorgi
Why You Should Root For Them: If you like winning, root for the Colts. They win. They always win. They'll get to the playoffs and win a round or two, no matter what people say about their offensive and defensive lines, or how many injuries they accrue. Their coach, Tony Dungy, is widely regarded as one of the classiest men in football. Bob Sanders, a 5'8" safety with fab dreadlocks and insatiable bloodlust, is a player anyone could root for. And as far as I'm concerned, Peyton Manning can coast on a lifetime of street cred for this.
Why You Shouldn't Root For Them: Because they're so damn good. Year in, year out. They do everything right, and everything well, and it's very annoying. If you have any predisposition to root for the underdog, stay away from the Colts. Additionally, the shady Baltimore-to-Indy dead-of-night flight was so stinky, you can still catch a whiff in Terre Haute. And before Saturday Night Live happened, SportSquee pretty much hated Peyton Manning. Peyton Manning's likability on the field versus Peyton Manning's likability off the field is as far apart as Baltimore and Indianapolis. Seeing what a grumpy Gus he is during the game is in stark, stark contrast to his ability to rock out to goofy music in a locker room.
Potential Boyfriends: Bob Sanders, Reggie Wayne, Jim Sorgi (because he'll have a lot of free time to spend with you)
2 comments:
Go Colts!!
I find my self rooting for the Colts, in spite of of myself (does that make sense???
I have a COMPLETLY unexplainable but totally UNHOLY crush on Peyton Manning. I have no idea why. I despise his personality, and I don't even find him that attractive. But if he so much as batted an eyelash in my direction, I would turn into a puddle on the floor. It's not somthing I'm proud of.
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